Caution: Quills may be sharp Circulation: 193,963,135 Issue: 728 | 15th day of Eating, Y18
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The Many Travels of a Pretty Kadoatie


by pandacat838

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Howdy Neopians! The name is Pretty Kitty, and let me tell you from the start that I’m a good kadoatie --- one of the best of my species, if I dare to add. Not being proud or anything here, just you know, when you’re so confident that it’s the truth, you sometimes get quite eager to share it with everyone you meet!

If I haven’t already caught your eye with my beauty, then let me tell you that the best of the best here is a lovely pink Kadoatie. Why, they even have an avatar released to celebrate my beauty, if you’re lucky enough to lay claim to it! I’m a soft kitty, warm kitty with nice fluffy fur, and I don’t meow incessantly like my neighbour across the street. I’ll just leave out the sad reality that dear Screamie’s owner is getting rich, from all her collections of 5,883nps every time Screamie goes off on one of her mewing sessions.

While my owner complains that I’m capable of spending more than 5,883nps for a single meal, and back when I was a teeny tiny Kadoatie, I took quite a liking to Blue Draik Eggs. I never understood why those things were so expensive, other than the fact that they tasted oh so good, as if it was a masterpiece from Queen Fyora herself (on the other paw, a Bag of Infinite Neggs is only 95nps, so it goes to show that Neopian Inflation proves too often to currently be more than 2.31% regardless of what the Shopkeepers try to tell you).

Anyways, I suppose I’ll take a short break with telling you all the important details of my life for now, for we’ll have lots of time for that when we go off on our merry way! Ah yes, how could I have missed the whole reason why you’re here --- to join me and my owner on one of our many Neopian travels!

Come over here, and let me walk you through this beautiful map of Neopia. Now I know it’s a little ancient, but I’ve had it since 2009 when someone dropped it off, with mention of plotting or Atlas of the Ancients, or something. And I’ve put it to mighty good use so far!

Now let me start with my favourites, and of course, move through the rest!

Faerieland – Who wouldn’t like Faerieland? You wouldn’t believe the amount of pink and purple you see in the pictures, and well, a pink Kadoatie like me would fit in perfectly! I’m sure everything is as beautiful as they say it is, with a magical springs of healing, and a rainbow fountain, and bridges and pools and rainbows! Imagine getting a stay in a castle, why it would be quite fitting for a beautiful princess like me, although I’d be more than happy to share a guest bedroom with you, since you are our honored guest!

If my appetite doesn’t get the best of me, maybe my owner will even treat us to a visit to the Faerie Caverns, although 400nps can be a hefty price to pay to explore a damp, dirty cave…probably filled with fungus I might add. But see, it’s worth getting your fur wet for in the end, because, well, who can refuse the allure of hidden treasures and Faerie Paint Brushes and pocketfuls of neopoints (all used to buy more Draik Eggs for yours truly, that is). Maybe we’ll even get to meet Queen Fyora herself!

Brightvale – Not as much to see here scenery-wise, especially compared to Faerieland (which is why it’s second on the list!), but still a must-visit in my books! First of all, it boasts of a beautiful castle and lush green meadows for us to frolic in! Besides feasting on the fruits of Brightvale, we can also feast on the best resources that Neopia has to offer for the mind. Delicate scrolls, ancient maps, brightly covered books --- anything and everything for the keen scholars of the world! As much as I’d like to show off a pretty face, let me just add that I have a brilliant mind to go along, and it sure is a lifelong dream for me to march right up to King Hagan and impress him with my intelligence. If you get a B, I heard that you get a handsomely wrapped book, engraved with King Hagan’s own signature, but what I’m aiming for is that elusive A, offering, among other things, perhaps even a keepsake avatar of King Hagan’s face!

Meridell – No thank you. I heard that King Skarl is always going off about the much admired King Hagan, and he eats all the food, even if it’s just Rotten Tomatoes, Blackened Bananas and Apples. It’s rumored that this is where Draik Eggs come from, but I refuse to believe anything they say in this regard!

Terror Mountain – Much too cold. All they seem to offer are slushies and snow pops and…ICE CREAM! Hello, isn’t it cold enough already? You can sign me up for a Caramel Hot Chocolate just thinking about that place! Although I heard that the Snow Faerie up there gives nice prices if you want to go on a quest for her.

The Lost Desert – Sand in your eyes? No thank you. If I was complaining about Terror Mountain being cold, well the heat is so much worse! On second thought, I’ll take a Chocolate Ice Cream please. Also heard that Qasala was still suffering from a Scarab problem. How many years has it been now?

Shenkuu – Do you know what sushi is made of? All of a Kadoatie’s favourite things, of course! I hate to admit that I don’t know as much as I’d like about this exotic getaway, but I do know it has such lovely waterfalls! Beautiful banners and towers and that model of Cyodrake’s Gaze. Tea’s particular’s good here too, and it’s even better alongside a hearty meal of sushi with extra fish! Only issue? Well, I have to admit that heights aren’t too appealing to Pretty Kitty, and the bridges are wobbly and the only thing connecting place to place at times. Too much to lose, shall we say that?

Mystery Island – Nothing particularly bad about this place, but nothing really interesting either. A beach tour would be nice if you can avoid the sand flying into your eyes. Some big fancy rocks and a tropical fruit shop that can’t compare to the fruits of Brightvale. Just too much sand all around.

Haunted Woods – With a name that already hints at being haunted, who would want to go there?

Krawk Island – Pirates? No thanks. Especially not when you couple that with the chance of falling off the ship, into…the water.

Kreludor – Something about the atmosphere being different here makes me scared that it’ll be enough to take my breath away.

Moltara – I was already complaining about the heat in the Lost Desert. What makes you think I’d be interested in this place?

Maraqua – I’m a Kadoatie, if you STILL haven’t noticed. Have you forgotten where Maraqua is located? NO THANK YOU.

Enough of those ramblings, it looks like we’re heading out now! I heard it was going to be a long journey, but I’m sure it’ll be more than worth it, especially since we even have an honored guest with us today (yes, that’s YOU!). Just have to duck under this bridge, swerve right, oh pick up the pace here, turn left, and left again, and head down this pebbled path, make a sharp right here, and…

Wait…this looks all too familiar, I think I’ve been here before! Why, it’s Neopian Central, why are we here…and now taking the turn into the Neopian Plaza.

WHAT? I’m going…out of all places, to the…KADOATERY?

One Happy Anniversary Negg please.

 
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